Without fail, traveling the subway yields yet another frightening experience. When you travel any where, it is always important to be aware of your surrounding just in case you need to pick someone out of a line up later. While I sat in an NYC subway station with my homie, I glanced up from my oh so entertaining crossword game on my phone to see what was good around me. To our right, I noticed a man who seemed a bit inebriated, but not too much of a threat. He seemed to be playfully flirting with a woman, but after I saw her scurry toward to the other end of the platform, I thought, uh oh, this guy could be an issue.

Nonetheless, I continued to play the game with my friend, glancing up ever few seconds to see where dude was. Just as I thought the cost was clear, things started to get ugly. The man made his way over to where my friend and I were sitting. As he walked over, he repeated “I just want to ::insert a choice four letter word here:: about 4 or 5 times. Thankfully he was thoughtful enough to warn those with children to “cover their ears”.

When it became apparent that he was coming to sit next to us, my friend and I tensed up. The last few minutes revealed a few things about this subway man: he was possibly drunk, high, medicated, suffering from mental illness, or some combination of the four, and he had little regard for the personal space of others. These things combined make for a very unpredictable situation.

As he sat next to my friend, subway man proceeded to look at my friend and comment on her physical appearance. No, he didn’t “Why miss, don’t you look lovely today?” He more or less verbally harassed her, commenting on what he perceived her age to be, and how she had several body parts that made her look like a woman. He was sure to note that because of how old she looked, he would probably get in trouble with the law if he tried to pursue something further with her.

While he made these highly offensive comments, my friend and I sat frozen with shock, fear, a little pinch of disgust, and a dash of concern. As she held on my iPhone for dear life, and I sat leaned in very close to her in poor attempt to protect her somehow, it was very clear that neither one of us really knew what to do. Were we to get up, at the risk of him following us? Should we have said something? Trust, I tried to think of something witty, yet stern to get him to bug off, but I couldn’t formulate the words.

The option we choose was…well, we didn’t really choose one. One could argue that we choose to be strong and silent. However, for me, it was almost as though I felt defenseless. If you know anything about me, I like to protect people. In this case, I didn’t know what to do to protect my friend from his words.

Thankfully, the train finally arrived and gave us our chance to make a break for it. As we got up and scurried for the train, harassing subway man followed. We did a little stick and move trick to ditch him and hopped on the train. For a while, my friend and I just looked at each other with wide eyes and bushy tails and shook our heads in disbelief at what just occurred.

Sadly, this story is not unique to us. The NY Metro featured an article on this subject. Its easy to make fun of the “crazy” people on the subway or on the streets. Its also easy to disregard stories like this, or even experiences like this, as nothing to be bothered by because he was just some guy on the subway and not a boss or co-worker. But a violation is a violation. Ick.